Question 9.151

9.151 Do you think that this vision of marriage and of the indissolubility of the conjugal bond is shared by all African ethnic groups?

Yes, there is not even any doubt about this question. For example, in the Fon culture, in Benin, the term Sesi refers to the first wife who is exchanged for a dowry and is married as a virgin, and facing her there must always be the Sesu, the first husband married in the first wedding. At the time of the woman’s funeral, it becomes quite clear that monogamy and indissolubility are traditional, firmly anchored in the African practice of marriage.

We encounter the term Sesi precisely within the framework of the funeral ceremonies that are designed to send the deceased woman off on her journey from this world toward that of the Supreme Being. The funeral ceremonies of a deceased wife require certain gestures and rituals of her husband, in particular the rite of clothing. A woman is often buried with a number of loincloths. The tradition welcomes loincloths from family members, friends, acquaintances, and successive husbands that she may have had. Nevertheless, the rite of clothing is carried out only in the presence of the very first husband, the Sesu. Until he is there, the ceremony cannot proceed. Moreover, whatever wealth the other successive husbands may own, the first husband, even if he is poor and miserable, has the right to perform the role of spouse for the woman and to clothe her with a view to her passage to the next world. She is in fact Sesi. And he is the one who determines the hour of the burial. Thus, in this cultural context, it is clear that a woman is destined to marry only one man by a true wedding, just as her family accepts a dowry for her only once. The other husbands are considered as lovers and friends. The moment of truth at death helps us to grasp the profound sense of purposefulness underlying the Black African cultural universe.

We can declare with certainty that, in the African cultural context, a woman, after having served as a wife to other men besides her first husband, with the knowledge and ready agreement of the group, finds herself at the end of her life restored to her original status.

I would like to conclude this mention of the African tradition by paying my respects to John Paul II, who in Familiaris consortio definitively sealed the teaching and discipline of the Church that are founded on Sacred Scripture. Today, I think that we should stop discussing this question like disrespectful intellectuals, giving the impression of disputing the teaching of Jesus and the Church. Some Western governments, with great disdain for God and nature, are passing insane laws about marriage, family, and human life. For her part, the Church cannot behave frivolously in God’s sight.